Flapjacks and Home Grown Veg

Good afternoon, how are you today? Well, I hope? Enjoying the warm, autumnal sunshine? It's glorious here today, I would have taken myself for a walk down the lane to enjoy the last of the year's good weather, but Dom accidentally took both sets of keys to work, so I couldn't lock the house! Never mind, an uneventful but pleasant day passed, with some surfing, baking and plenty of knitting. And a measure of Murder, She Wrote.

I wanted to share with you some of the pictures of our garden. We have quite a small vegetable garden and an 8ft x 6ft greenhouse, but we like to put every inch to good use. For example, here are the runner beans scambling up the fence by the children's swing and slide

We've not seemed to do so well with any sort of beans or peas this year - last year we harvested 22lb of runner beans! I'm not sure whether the new location is too dry, the weather was unfavourable this year, or whether some other force is at play. I intend to research over winter to inform our planning next year.

The courgettes, pumpkins, squashes and marrows have been brilliant. I just love their rotund confidence, their bright, brassy yellow flowers and the fact that scramble over one another in such a disorganised way. They went in a new bed at the back of the garden; our cat TC was often seen curled sleepily around a pumpkin dozing in the warm sunshine.

We have made every effort to enjoy the fruit we've grown - including the six blackcurrants and two raspberries! Again, this was not an area of success, although we had wild blackberries growing in the hedgerow and these have done very well indeed.

I haven't got any pictures, but carrots, onions and beetroot seem to have done well again. Our perpetual spinach looks like it's starting to grow; that kept us going most of last winter. Fingers crossed it makes a reappearance. All our herbs and salad leaves were disappointing this year, though.

Finally I wanted to show you our tomatoes, a hybrid called 'hundreds and thousands.' Like the name suggests, you should be able to harvest hundreds and tiny, grape sized tomatoes from each plant. At the moment we have about dozen from six plants, but I haven't given up hope yet!

Pottering about in the garden is one of my favourite ever things to do; our whole family gets a great deal of pleasure. It makes me very excited to be able to share the fruits of our labour with you! 

Finally, yesterday I promised to share my made-up-on-the-spot recipe for lemon and honey flapjacks. A whole tray lasted two days in this house, which is testament to how they tasted, I believe. I love cooking 'off piste' but rarely is something made-up as good as these.

Lemon and Honey Flapjacks

250g porridge oats

150g butter

75g honey

75g sugar

75g sultanas

2 lemons, zested and squeezed

 

1. Heat the oven to gas mark 4 and grease a baking tin approx 20cm.


2. Melt the butter, sugar and honey in the microwave, or in a pan


3. Mix the oats into the liquid and stir well.


4. Add the sultanas, lemon zest and juice ensuring it is evenly combined


5. Put the mixture into the tin, and press down firmly with the back of a spoon to ensure the flapjack sticks together.


6. Bake in the middle of a pre-heated oven for 25-30 mins. It should be golden and brown around the edges when it is done. It may still appear quite liquid, but will solidify as it cools. Cut into pieces whilst still hot, but leave to cool in the pan.

Enjoy!

 

Some reasons to feel proud

My lovely kitchen knick-knacks that cheer me up every day.

Hello my lovelies, how are you all doing?  I hope you didn't miss me too much over the past six days. I have been thinking of you all, and hoping that you're finding the light at the end of the tunnel.

It was one heck of a week for me, my feelings were flying round like a cloud of gnats, and I wanted a bit of time to reflect and get my head together. Thank you so much to those of you who emailed to say that you didn't think the blog was showing off, the encouragement really helped.

So... last week was a week of big changes. For some reason, at the moment, I am not very good at change. The first weekend back after the start of the school term was tough for me, as I think I said before, because I slipped straight back into 'Mum' and, for the first time since the start of the summer holidays, I didn't make any allowances for the illness. That was a mistake and I started the week feeling somewhat overwrought.

Monday and Tuesday I had Charlie at home with me full time - it sounds like nothing, but I have not looked after him from 6am to 7pm on my own for a long time. He was full of beans because he was excited about starting school, prone to emotional outbursts and, if I admit it, a bit naughty because he, too, was overwrought. I was depressed and needing peace and quiet! Not a great combination, you'll have to admit.

Monday we went out to a few shops - Asda, McDonalds, we took some old clothes to the charity shop and by the time I got home and did the housework (why?!) I had done too much. Tuesday I could barely get off the sofa, and felt horribly, awfully guilty for squandering Charlie's last day at home with me. I spent a lot of the time in tears, including the evening when I cried in bed. Dom was shocked and worried, but wonderfully patient.

Wednesday was the big day. Charlie was so excited I thought he would burst. I was really anxious about taking him to this new institution, nervous about what to do and where to go, worried on his behalf, sad that he was leaving the nest, excited for myself and my new freedom - a whole muddle of feelings. Anyway, suffice to say he was fine, in fact he's had a lovely time. And I have quickly got used to my new routine. Shall I share a picture? He is a very good Reason To Be Proud this week.

Isn't he just adorable? That's Billy with him, his teddy bear that has gone pretty much everywhere from birth. Of course Billy needed his hand holding as he was nervous about starting school, and the teachers made every effort to welcome Billy to the classroom and even let him come in and listen to the lessons. Charlie was very glad he was there, I think.

I have been trying to gain inspiration from my little man - he's taking on the world because he's not worrying about too much at once. I could do the same. Good enough is good enough, nothing has to be perfect. So I thought I would share with you some of the things bringing me happiness at the moment, if not because it balances the days when I am having to run through in my head the list of reasons I should not want to die.

You may wonder why I seem to gravitate toward the homemade/craft blogs. As well as being something that I love doing, and just.... well, I can't express it easily... feels right and as though it will help me get better, I am in awe of those wonderful women, so full of character life and creativity. I need their warm domesticity, I guess I need to be mothered myself. And I also want to me that sort of mother.

So, here are some things I have been proud of doing this week.

Look - cables and shaping! I mastered short rows! Yeee-haw! I'll ignore the fact that I have been knitting this jumper since May, that this part literally took weeks and, when I sewed the whole thing up the gauge was wrong and the jumper made me look like Barbapapa. Who cares, when you've made something curved, with cables?! <does happy dance> I am making it into something funky, so watch this space....

I invented a recipe! These are lemon and honey flapjacks and, believe me, they are divine. I will post the recipe tomorrow. Made from honey from our very own bees! sadly, the lemons were from Tesco (wouldn't it be lovely to be able to grow those too?)

My fantastic pumpkin patch. We now have pumpkins, squashes, marrows and still the odd courgette. More home-grown vegetable pictures tomorrow, but it feels me with such a thrill to produce food through love and nurture.

I'm going to come out of this depression one day, aren't I? One day I won't have to run through my lists of why I should be alive, or convince myself I won't attempt suicide today. One day, I won't feel stoned on my meds, or spend the day in a fluffy coma on the sofa. One day, I will be able to answer the phone and make calls without blinking an eyelid. One day I will again wear make up, get my hair cut, have a job (career, maybe), smile and not feel as though I am deceving people.

One day soon .... xxxx